Tag Archives: blogging

Another day older….

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Another day older…another year wiser. This is my reality.  I never would have ever imagined getting to be 41 years old. This number had been so foreign to my young mind. 

Now that I’m here, it’s all that it’s pumped up to be. Yes, I’ve hit that mark where I can care less about my birthday. 

Why? For one, I have young kids. And they come first. My joy is their joy. It’s not that I don’t matter anymore, but my essence is them!

As much as I cringe at this 40-something age, I have no choice, but to embrace it. I know I am welcoming wrinkles, grey hair and lower energy levels, but with it comes an increase of awareness of life. I feel great having the wisdom I did not have in my 20s and 30s. It is a beautiful nuisance, but I prefer it over my young feeble minded self. 

I can embrace the beauty of innocence. My innocent children will never know the mental struggles I went through when I was young. And that brings me happiness. The beauty they see brings me happiness. 

That is all that matters when it becomes another day older, another day wiser. 

-camistar.com

“Americanality”

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“Americanality”, an urban word I describe of “what is”.  I no longer live in America. America is what I was born into, a world that was full of hope. My America is now morphing into a world of physical and mental toxicity.

Americanality-Noun: A country built on bleeding blood. A country built on immigration. A country that fought for “the people”. A country that slowly woke up and fought for equal rights among race, class and gender.

Americanality-Verb: A country of people who can be grouped into different thought processes. Most people are either humanists or inhumane. Humanists have an interest to pursue and educate ourselves and others with knowledge in order to not make the same mistakes from our past. We want to grow to a higher level of thinking in order to help ourselves and the world. It is having concern for the well being of others and the world we live in. 

The latter is the opposite. It is greed by putting fortunes and wealth before the well being of humans. It is digging up death no matter the cost (i.e. oil). It is racism.  It is watching a group of racists march, join and shout “white power”, but what does that even mean? “White” is a color, NOT a race or culture. 

Americanality is today. It is the year 2016 up to 2020. Many humans have fought and died for equal rights. Susan B. Anthony fought for the rights for women to vote. And look at who women voted for in our Trump vs. Hillary election!? This is why, in my eyes, America is no longer America today, it is now “Americanality”.

How could a sane, conscious women vote for a womanizing man? A man who does not have respect for the female gender. It is an insult to the women who fought for our voting rights! A disgusting insult!

We all know the story of the famous Mr. King who fought for equal rights, peace and justice among people of color. Or better yet, for all humans who were socially and economically disadvantaged. During his time period, he stood up and resisted all hate and racism that affected humanity. He empowered each soul who suffered. Today, no matter what race, class, gender or color you are, you can go to school, get a college education, you can sit on a bus and you can go everywhere and anywhere! Sadly, things may change. 

On a positive note, there are many of us “Americans” who are consciously aware of what is going on.  We can resist the toxic ways our society is going toward. As long as you read and always check your facts, you will be okay. 

Educate yourself and your kin because four years can be as long or as short as reality allows.  

My “Americanality” can and will go back to America, but we the people have a lot of work to clean up. 




Be The Revolution!

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​”Viva La Revolucion in Ustados Unidos 2016″

Today in the year 2016, I never thought I would be living through this chaos. Can you believe it? I absolutely cannot! It is unreal.  We have “Black lives matter” only because our police racially profile. Today Native Americans are being brutalized all because they are trying to continue to protect their sacred land as well as everyone’s drinking water (unreal).  You can talk to almost all Americans protesting the president-elect Mr. Donald Trump. We read about the KKK (what the hell is going on?!) protesting white power. It is beyond unbelievable. I feel like I’m in a nightmare awaiting to be awoken. It is beyond fearful for what tomorrow may become.

As a child of the 80s, I grew up in a lower to middle class world. I did not know what “the struggle” was as I always had a roof, food, clothing and an education. The biggest thing I had was a working mother who taught me what her and her family went through in the 1950 and 60s. My dad grew up in East L.A. and he spoke of the walk-outs and how proud we should be to be Mexican American. But around me, I never saw hate. Was I sheltered? Or was I just being a kid unaware of reality?

As a latchkey child, I knew how to be independent, which helped me get through college. It is when I was in college when I awakened. I finally learned what the real world was made of. I read about women equality issues, racial segregation to political corruption. My eyes and ears opened. My life would never be the same. It was like walking through a door to another universe.

I swam through the high and low tides of our ocean while doing what I can as an activist for human rights. I happily sat at N.O.W. (National Organization of Women) meetings while brainstorming how to educate our world on women’s rights. I spent weekends in Needles, Ca. on an Indian Reservation protesting the government on them taking their land (again). 
Then, I had kids and did not have the time to do the footwork of an activist, but what I have done, is teach my daughter’s what the real world is. They know of the political corruption and how to treat everyone equally regardless of their race, class or gender. Today, I am not afraid to speak on behalf of my own personal rights in regards to my race, gender or employment. 

My biggest revolution today is to make sure all kids with special needs have equal access to a free and appropriate education. Everyone has a different agenda, but regardless of your agenda, of all days, of all years, this is NOT the time to sit and be quiet. 

One of my favorite quotes comes from Dante, “The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in times of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality”. Today we are living what will be written in future history books. 

Speak up!

Yell!

Talk!

Spread knowledge!

Fight the corruption or it WILL fight you down to the ground! 

Blotch of a Day

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I’m looking forward to tomorrow. A new day. A new sun. New air. New light. I just want a new day. Like today was a fucken blotch and I can’t wait for a retry, like when you lose on PAC-Man, you get two more chances and then you die. Except, I won’t die, I’ll just wake-up and have another try.

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Last Day of 2015

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It is the last day of the new year,
she is supposed to be
“releasing negativity”
to begin a “fresh start”,

Bye Bad People,
Bye Judgments,
Bye Bad Relationships,
Bye Stress,
Bye bad, bad, bad!

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She sits,
She ponders,
REALIZATION hits,
There is no negativity
in her realm!
What is the big deal?

Her realm is a balance
of ying and yang,
Her darkness is balanced
with light,
Her lack in one area
Is strengthened
with another,

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Out with the old:
Bye you, you, and you!

And in with the new:
Hi, Hello, Kisses!

Good Bye 2015. You were great!
Hello 2016!

Happy New Year,

Cami*Star
Last post of 2015 (well maybe)
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Soul Blogging

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There are many different types of humans in this world. I have met lovers of life, liars and those who are stuck in their own darkness. But the individuals we can really see are those who we are intimate with. Intimacy breaks down all walls and we can see their whole soul.

I have to say, throughout my adulthood, regardless of what one may have or have not gone through, I have the utmost respect for the soul that can look at one person and be only about that one person.

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That soul is me, but I already respect myself and maybe this is why I respect individuals who can be monogamous.

I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but I feel like we only have one life, we should enjoy it to our fullest potential(s). And when we meet someone we connect with, why not enjoy it and take the beautiful ride?

Not all humans believe in this way of life, but maybe one day, they’ll wake up and see how beautiful one soul can be for them, especially the one soul they connect with.

Until then, the soul that walks next to me is the soul I respect. That soul will get the deepest love I can offer because tomorrow is never promised, so I shall live for today!

Namaste,

Cami*Star 2015

One Positive Day

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How about for one day, we just stop bashing one another! I’m so sick and tired of hearing and reading about hateful words. All these humans in the world complain about x,y, and z, but they don’t realize they’re part of the problem!

I’m so serious! I would love for everyone to be positive just for one day. For example, instead of caring what celebrities look like without make-up, instead give them props to be able to be themselves in a judgmental world. Or instead of saying how fat a guy/girl is, maybe finding something beautiful about them. The biggest one is, instead of complaining how jacked up your life is, how about looking at all your blessings. I mean, c’mon, you’re alive, right?

Our world, your world, your sense of well-being will NEVER change unless you change your thoughts!

I don’t get why this idea isn’t even taught in school’s! Instead, kids are taught to rat out their bullies. How about working with these bullies, giving them some spiritual guidance instead of suspending them.

Our whole system is backward thinking. We don’t try to help anyone be better humans, instead we bash, bash, bash. We imprison the souls who are suffering and they only come out worse! We don’t reward college grads with awesome jobs, instead we kill them (including myself) with student loans only to become enslaved to money.

All these single mom’s in our world don’t get high fives, instead they get criticized and made to feel guilty because they are doing it alone instead of doing it with a partner ( which is some kinda great thing in our society). Instead we reward married couples who stay together for the sake of their kin when in reality they may be miserable. Geesh!

Let’s break these backward thoughts and ideas! Let’s move to a new world! A world that is full of positive radiance. Where everyone is beautiful and nothing is ugly.

I know, I know, wishful thinking, but maybe, maybe one day before I leave mother earth we will move closer to love rather than hate.

Who knows.

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Respect Yourself

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I constantly read poems on how one would keep going back to their lovers even after their heart was broken. All for one more kiss. One more hug. One more chance. Fuck that. You break my heart and you’re screwed. I will keep going forward and never look back.

Like the typical saying goes (with my twist). Hurt me once, shame on YOU, Hurt me twice, shame on ME, Hurt me a third time, it’s my damn fault for even allowing a third and now my heart is cold as ice.

It’s all about respecting yourself. Respect yourself enough to not allow another human being to hurt you.

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Baffling Thoughts

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I feel so lost in this world. It’s like I was born in the wrong era or Universe. I just don’t get people’s hate and anger. It’s baffling to me.

But it’s not just that. I feel so deeply. My heart and soul feels everything! But it just seems like I’m the only one who is like this. I mean, instead of loving thoughts, I get hurtful and annoying words thrown at me. But instead of throwing rocks back, I just stand my ground and then my positive behavior is oblivious to on lookers.

And then there’s the whole part where I  am so open to love. But people have walls up (and yes I do too, but those walls only go up if I get hurt).

What world do I belong in?
It just seems like not this one….

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-©camistar.com 2015

Men are DOGS

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Well, well, well.  I got your attention.  What do you know!  Well, what I know, is that in our fumbling of a society, we tend to call each gender names.  Why?  Because both genders; male and female are two completely beings.  We have different agendas when it comes to our lives sexually, emotionally, and in relationships.  

Women have been called bitch, whore, slut, tramp, drama queen and I am sure you can add more to that list.  Is it degrading?  Hell yeah!  

Men on the other hand really only have a few degrading names, such as dog and asshole.  

Here we are in our universal world, continuing to live in an unequal world.  What I am trying to discuss, is embracing these words if they fit you.  I mean,  being called a “dog” or “asshole” coming from my point of view if not so degrading as being called a “bitch” or “slut”, but let’s get over the power of the word.  If you’re acting like the word is described, why would you get offended?  This is where I am at in my thoughts.  

I mean really.  It is common sense, right?  IF, a female is walking around not being in their happy zone and telling everyone off in a store, yeah, they are acting like a “bitch”.  Embrace it girl!  Yes, your acting it and you have chosen to act as such, so take it like a champ.   If a male is walking around the store with disrespect for everyone in the store by bumping into people without saying sorry, then telling the cashier to “hurry the fuck up because he has to hurry his ass to get to work”.  Then, yeah, I would say in our society language that he has chosen to act like an “asshole” and he should embrace it just like the bitch.  I know many men and women who act like fools and they do admit it.  Yes, admit it, learn from it, apologize and then learn from it!  

On the aspect of our sexual lives, this is when it gets complicated and sad to degrade both genders, but mainly women who take the biggest hit.  But in reality, once again, embrace it.  Shoot, if you are truly living a certain life style, why get offended?  I mean, really?  Yes, I do know that females get hit with hard words, but the behaviors are the same.  Let’s take a look: 

Let’s begin with the lesser degradation.  MEN.  MEN ARE DOGS!!!  What does this even mean???  The real definition is a person regarded as “unpleasant, contemptible, or wicked (used as a term of abuse)”.  So, when we say, “men are dogs” in relation to the fact that they are sleeping with more than one women, this does NOT fit the cake!  I mean, they are not acting “unpleasant”, shoot, it’s the opposite, they are getting a lot of pleasantry!  They are not abusing anyone, they are enjoying it!  So, in essence, this term is actually taken out of context.  But let’s act like we don’t even know the real definition.  In our society, the “WEST”, when we call a man a dog, it means, they are sleeping around and it is a good thing!  They are getting them some!  I see nothing wrong with this!  It’s a good thing!  So, here we go again, if a male is acting like a “dog”, then gosh darn, embrace it!  Do I agree with it?  HELL NO!  But you will not change for anyone, you will do what you want, just take precautions and be careful, you dog! (As I smile and look at your cute face).  BUT, I have found that some men get  flustered when a female makes a comment as such.  “Men are DOGS!”  LESSON:  if you are going to do the deed as such, accept the garbage language and laugh it off! 

On the other side of the coin, I am sure there are many women who sleep around as well.  Of course in our society, we call them whores, sluts, tramps and are thought to be disgusting creatures when they are doing the “dog” thing!  NOW, as we all know, we live in an unequal gendered society.  Fine, instead of arguing and getting heated by being called by all these degrading names, laugh it off and know you are getting yourself some hot love!  

Just like being called a “dog” as a male, if someone calls you a “slut” because you sleep around, embrace it because the real, technical definition is, “a women who has many sexual partners”.  Nothing wrong with that!  Actually, it is a better definition than being a male “dog”.  What is degrading is being called a “whore”, do you know why?  Because the real definition is being a prostitute and selling yourself for money!  NOW, that is down right dirty!!  I guess they finally got us, females!  I say, just turn it around, if someone calls you such, say, “I”m not a whore, but maybe a slut”.  Ha, that still sounds wrong!  But in the real world, if you are a female and you are sleeping around, embrace it girl!  It is what you enjoy doing if your are living that way.  Who am I to judge?  Who are we to judge?  If a man is given a high five because he is a “dog”, then girl, you deserve a high five too!  The tables are actually turned here because it is much easier to be a slut as us females can get it from any man because they are all dogs!  (pun intended)  

Above it all.  I am not a dog, whore, slut or tramp.  I am me and I embrace that.  If I ever do decide (and have in my past) to sleep with more than one man, I have never been offended by being called a “slut”.  I embraced it because that was my action and I made that choice.  And it was actually nice!  

So, enjoy your sexual relationships, embrace the words as they are only words!  Yes, words hurt, BUT if you are acting it, why get upset!  On the bigger hand, let’s try to just ignore the gender inequality of thoughts by all those crazy thinking people out in the world.  

Cheers!